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Morning light.  Tired eyes open, squinty. Through the fringe of eyelashes the air is alive with fairy dust.  Eyes wide now. Mamma and daddy need to see this! There are whys that need to be answered. Why did the fairies come and decorate the air? And why did they leave?

She doesn’t yet know the word “mote,” but she is an expert on glitter. She decorates paper plates with glitter and glue.  And she can make a necklace with macaroni and string. The macaroni necklace needs glitter and glue! She’ll have to tell mamma.

The air is so pretty.  It’s just like the water drops in the bathtub that turn to diamonds when you look at them right.  No one else seems to see them.  It’s always, “Hurry up.  Get out of the tub. I’m tired” or “Come on, we need to dry your hair before you get sick.”

She discovers momma and daddy still asleep, oblivous to fairies and air that glitters.

Daddy is better at why. She pads over to his side of the bed where he is asleep on his back. She stands there patiently waiting for him to wake up. An eternity of 10 seconds passes.  She stares at him trying to force him awake with her will.  Nothing. She stands there wondering what is the best way to wake him up without making him grumpy. She has an idea! She  will open his eyes for him so he can wake up seeing the sparkly air.  She positions her fingers above his eye lid and then pops it open.

He jumps awake like he’s been shot.

She runs away as he  yells, “Valentina! What the hell are you doing?!”

She adds another why to the ever growing collection: Why does nobody ever seem impressed that the whole world sparkles?

the scribe that came to dinner

Stay at the center of the circle and let all things take their course.

–Lao Tzu

What is to give light must endure burning.

— Viktor Frankl

~~~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~~

My guiding principle this year has been to cultivate joy by going in the direction that uses my energy in the most positive  and productive light.

Life has a way of unfolding in an interesting series of twists and turns, but since acquiring this principle it has erupted quite suddenly in an unexpected flourish.  But let’s be clear on one point: Cultivating joy is an arduous process  –  one that can make you cry, bleed, and beg for mercy.  Such is the blissful life.  There is always the union of opposites. Nothing in creation is in vain.

The first week I moved in to Peace.Love.Home., I fell victim to a brutal rose bush attack. I was only trying to nurture the dying plant back to good health with a little pruning. The vicious thing chewed me up and spit me out of its hideous maw.

Two months later, the wounds have healed over, but the thorns remain embedded lumpily in my skin. The rose bush consumed me and I consumed it.  It makes me feel all superhero-like actually.  Think “Spiderman,” except I’m “Rosewoman,”  my superpower being….smelling good and looking pretty? Ok, not so much, unless you like the smell of dirt, sunshine, lady sweat, and tears. And the appearance of a middle-aged woman with the hairdo of “a 5 year old who’s been playing outside all day,” which is how the Indentured Servant described it when I came in for water the other day.  And then there’s the matter of the rash(es) all over my hands, arms, and legs.  At last peek in the mirror it was spreading up my neck and the right side of my face.  Possibly poison oak? sumac? ivy? or some sexy combination of the three. The rashes mix and mingle with the mosquito bites to give my skin a mottled, diseased appearance. And let’s not forget the sunburn, which is a single strip of red situated across my lower back where my shirt tail didn’t quite reach the waistband of my pants as I was bent over the bed pulling weeds for hours.

Nature is a beautiful, but cruel mistress.

If you don’t believe me, ask the writing spiders in the backyard…

the mate that crosses this lady is likely to lose his head

[Your partner] will make you see more about yourself than any navel gazing in solitude could ever reveal.  And if the process isn’t completely horrifying and frustrating, then you’re just not doing it right.

Jane Lynch

We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”

–Galway Kinnell

~*~

He sold a guitar to buy her engagement ring.  He was going to give it to her on Christmas day, but he wound up proposing two weeks before because he couldn’t wait.

She was horrified by the thought of a public wedding because it would involve too many eyes looking at her all at once.  Besides, who had money to waste on some stupid party? She wanted to elope. Eloping was perfectly fine by him.  Their mothers were appalled by the very idea and pushed for a church wedding.  Suddenly it was ok for the young couple to continue “living in sin,” as the mothers called it, for many months longer if it meant they could plan the wedding.  The mothers joined forces and just started planning the damn thing without the couple’s consent.

“Ok, whatever” the would-be bride said with an eye roll.

The day before the wedding, he got a new hairdo, trading in his 1980s rocker hair for a mullet.

WTF, M8??

The ceremony that took eight months for the mothers to plan lasted 14 minutes.

And time passed….the couple ate a lot of Totino’s pizza, they got a cat, they bought a house, they got a dog, he changed jobs, she went back to school, they argued,  they made up, relatives died, relatives were born, he played guitar, they tried new foods, she graduated a few times, they took care of kids, he took classes, they lost touch with old friends, he studied Kung Fu, they went on vacations, they made new friends, they sold and bought cars, they took a lot of walks in the park, they reconnected with old friends,  she took a job out of state, the cat died, the dog died, they watched movies, she got a new cat, they got a new dog, they sold a house, they bought a farm…

…and 18 years later, she still looks at him and thinks, “This is the problem I want to have.”

…or at least that’s what I was instructed to do when Dana nominated me for the Kreativ Blogger Award in her blog. 

In reality I think my adoring crowd consists of just Dana.  But Dana, I am smiling and waving at you!

The “Rules” for this particular award are:

1. Thank the blogger who presented you with the award. Thanks Dana!!


2. Post a photo of the award.

TADA!

3. Share ten things about yourself readers don’t know.

          3-1.  I don’t have a TV, but I am maniacally tearing through two shows via Netflix. The first is Legend of the Seeker.  Everything and everybody is just so pretty on this show.  And the sword fights are like dances.  It makes me giddy.

The second is Big Bang Theory, a show that is funny and that features smart people who use big words.  Being a scientist has never been so sexy.  Thank you Chuck Lorre and Bill Prady!

          3-2. I briefly entertained the idea of going to  Cancun/Tulum/Chichen Itza  for spring break  because the  “2012 end of the Mayan calendar” seemed like THE time to go.  Then I decided I was being cliché  and that maybe I should just stay home, read a book and  and plant a garden instead. 

          3-3. Speaking of books, these are the ones I’m concurrently reading: The Lost Art of Compassion, 2012 The Return of Quetzalcoatl, Born to Talk, The Geography of Bliss.

          3-4.  I went to Tulsa last weekend, mostly to eat. 

          3-5. I ate cupcakes with eggs in Tulsa — the first violation of my dietary restriction in months.  The Devil made me do it (as usual).  He said he wouldn’t tell anyone, but there’s no point denying it happened.

Kupcakz of Tulsa! My favorite.

          3.6 While in Tulsa I also drank Irish hot chocolate. Two cups in fact. 

          3.7   Following this imbibement, I  drunk-texted my yogini support group for an emergency intervention.  With their help I managed to resist ordering a hamburger from the restaurant that serves the best hamburgers I’ve ever had anywhere. Ever.  (Thank you yogini’s for talking me down off that ledge!)

          3.8 Then I apparently took some drunken pictures of Tulsa…

          3.9  Tulsa is one of my favorite cities. On this trip we visited a spot I didn’t know existed until recently.  It’s known as “The Center of the Universe.”  It appears to be an ordinary place in downtown Tulsa  bordered by buildings and a parking garage.  However, ordinary it is not.  There is a certain place that has very odd (and unintentional) acoustic properties. If you walk up and stand at the center of a circle of bricks and speak, your voice will h ave an odd distorted quality. If your partner stands right outside the circle and you are in the circle listening to yourself talk with this weird voice, he will not hear anything odd about your voice.  If your partner stands in the circle while you stand in the circle and you both talk you both will hear the weird distortion.  If you both stand in the circle in the cold trying out a variety of weird voices to see how they will sound  you will be delighted at the effect; however, other people passing by outside the circle may look at you quite strangely and wonder if you’re crazy. At any rate, from what I’ve read the archeticture of a nearby concrete planter has a parabolic reflectivity that creates the acoustic effect.

          3-10 One last weird thing about Tulsa — the sky seems unusually high. There is just so much of it and it is so far away.

4. Choose six people to present this award to.

          4-1 Amy – because your blogs are creative, but they don’t come nearly enough.

          4-2 The Good Greatsby – because you’ve made smoking jackets cool again.

          4-3 Tori Nelson –  because letting readers plan your wedding is creative and fun and…brave.

          4-4 Rene – because Life in the Boomer Lane makes me giggle on a regular basis.

          4-5 Plum Bananas – because you promote good health and keep two blogs and reading your blog makes me feel less neurotic.

          4-6 Progress on the Prairie – because your blog inspired me to grow arugula and I have to respect a woman willing to kill for herself a life she consumes.

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