A spiritual practice is one that brings us full circle – not to a new self, but rather back to the essence of our true selves.                                                                    

-Rolf Gates

I followed all 5 guidelines.  The food guideline is by far the most difficult, although it was easily doable today.  I think part of my problem with the food guideline is that it seems so radical.  It requires a lot of thought and effort because seafood, meat, and eggs are hidden in so many things. Let’s take cheese for example.  You don’t have to extinguish a life to get the  the milk to make cheese, but the cheese-making people have to go and put rennet (i.e., baby cow stomach) in most of it.  The only rennetless cheddar cheese I could find at the store after five minutes of looking at cheese was a GIANT block of white cheddar. I bought it, but I’m not happy about it. White cheddar stresses me out because it lacks the aesthetically pleasing color palate that makes a baked potato look appetizing. It’s all a lot to think about and really, I don’t want to have to think that hard when I’m hungry; I just want to eat!   Add to that, I’m not comfortable with declaring my newfound vegetarianism to people (people besides you of course).  This is mostly because I’m not that good at being a vegetarian yet and I don’t want to have to explain all the whys behind my madness, especially when I don’t completely understand them all myself. Yes, there are the moral, ethical, and scientific arguments I could make, but I don’t want to get into arguments or even prolonged discussions about those things because they’re really not at the heart of the issue.  There is something else going on here that I cannot express.

Perhaps I am simply finding my way back home. I’m already here, of course, but the place has been extravagantly redecorated in the last few years and I keep bumping my shin on the coffee table in the dark. Could I get some light in here??